Chapter 1

School's Back In:

Handling Snafus Before the First Bell

You’ve endured shopping trips for the latest fashions with your picky son, taken out a small loan to buy him shoes, picked through hundreds of lunchboxes for just the right one, gone on a scavenger hunt for school supplies, and filled out so many forms that you can recite the pediatrician’s address by heart.

Getting your child ready for school may be a test of your shopping (and budgeting) skills, but it’s only half the battle. There are so many new things to experience that sending your child off to school can be a test of courage—yours and your child’s.

Unfortunately, the Parent Handbook the school sent home doesn’t really have the answers. (It does, however, say your son’s new shoes won’t be allowed because they have dark soles that could scuff the gym floor.)

“I’ve Got Who?!”

It’s the week before school starts and there’s a crowd by the front doors of the school. Everyone is chatting nervously. Finally, what everyone has been waiting for is posted: the class lists.

Your son scans the lists. “Oh, man! I’ve got Mrs. Walters!” he says, obviously unhappy.

While moving up a grade or starting school for the first time is exciting, a new teacher can also be a little frightening. Parents and kids alike hear stories about the teachers in their school and sometimes a teacher’s reputation can precede her or him. Students and parents may even have previous experience with a teacher that causes anxiety when class lists are posted. Or, sometimes, it’s a specific characteristic causing your child to worry.

As a general rule, once class lists are posted, they are set in stone. Most schools, afraid of setting precedents, will not make changes. This is why lists are frequently posted a day or two before class starts. The theory is parents are less likely to argue a placement if there’s not much time to pursue the issue. That is not to say all is lost if you or your child are unhappy about whose class he or she will be in. Here are a few tips to ease the anxiety:

Give the teacher a chance. If you’re feeling uneasy, meet the teacher and talk to her. See what she’s like. Ask about her approach with the kids or why she went into teaching. Put aside any preconceived notions you have and appreciate the teacher for who she is and the gifts she can bring to your child.

Talk to other parents or students who have had the teacher. You may have heard horror stories from some people but remember, you’re probably not getting the whole story. Ask other students and parents about their experiences. Chances are you’ll hear things like: “He gives a lot of homework but his space unit is a ton of fun!” or “He’s tough but the kids really seemed to love him.”

Give your child time to adjust. Getting used to a new teacher and her classroom style can take some time. Encourage your child to give her teacher a few weeks and to keep an open mind. Often times, the teacher your child hates at the beginning of the year is the same teacher she tearfully hugs good-bye in June!

Meeting the Teacher for the First Time

If you’re meeting your child’s teacher for the first time at an Open House, it’s best to keep things fairly brief. After you’ve introduced yourself, introduce your child. (You can also encourage your child to introduce herself.) Make sure you let the teacher know if your child has a nickname she prefers to go by.